"... These words are my diary, screaming out loud. And I know that you'll use them however you want to..."

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Words fail me...

So, here we are. Six months have passed since Kheri died and I have no idea what to say. I wish I had all kinds of grief metaphors, and words of encouragement for other BLM on their journey.... but there is nothing. It is raining today, and my hubby's Facebook status is " Rain seems appropriate today. I hate you, CF".

On another note, Kheri is being remembered by many today. Susan included Kheri in Gracie's birthday party, for which I am SO grateful. It is amazing how the horrors of child loss can bring perfect strangers together that have never met. I have received some notes of encouragement this morning, thanks to all who have sent those. Kheri's auntie Iris wrote another lovely tribute to Kheri. Thank you, my sister from another momma and mister, for that. Thanks to all, for the love and support over the last 6 months.

I am a fan of P!ink's music. I have heard this song on the radio a lot lately and it has been speaking to me. Especially the line that says

"Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?"

It reminds me of this blog world. The majority of my followers are perfect strangers, that I have never met, yet feel like I know. I wish we could all meet, and have dinner together. It really is amazing how sometimes, some of the people who understand and care the most, are people I have never met. Yet I have people that I know and live close, that do not understand, or care. This grief thing can be very lonely at times, especially when there are those who move away from you.

I read a post on Glow in the Woods, which I can't find right now, otherwise I would provide a link. It talks about weeding your garden, and getting rid of all the weeds that can choke out the beautiful flowers in your life. I think it may be time to really weed my garden, because some of those pesky weeds just will not go away. Time to review those priorities set back in February, when our old world ended, and this new one began.


  1. I had been replaying that day in my head on Saturday...every moment is so ingrained in my mind. The moment when I thought to myself "oh god..this is really happening"

    On the weeding front, I completely understand. You need the sunlight, and not the shadow of the weeds. Just like old clothes, some things just don't fit forever...

  2. I have been 'blue' all day thinking of all the things that we should be doing with Kheri. She is always close to our hearts and will be loved forever.
    Weed away! I have had to do that in my life and I am better for it. It's hard to do but necessary for your own spiritual growth.

  3. So much love to you, sweetie! Thinking of you, and remembering Kheri, on this tender anniversary day. I am so glad we found each other. I agree with you about the support and friendship we find here in the world of BLM blogs. I'd be lost without.

    Take good care of yourself. ((Hugs))